"Bullying is repeated exposure, over time, to negative actions from one or more other students. Negative actions can include physical, verbal or indirect actions that are intended to inflict injury or discomfort upon another."(Dan Olweus) Bullying is aggressive behavior where a teen is targeted by one or more other teens with repeated negative actions over a period of time. These are intentional attempts to cause discomfort or injury and can include name-calling, making faces, obscene gesturing, malicious ridicule, threats, rumors, physical hitting, kicking, pushing, and choking. Very often bullying will occur when there is an imbalance of power favoring the bully. Victims are often submissive and shy and fail to defend themselves.
In elementary and middle school, typically, the “schoolyard bully” is a boy, usually much bigger and physically stronger than the other children, although a little kid can also be a bully if motivated. But in high school, bullying goes underground, is expressed more subtly, and is perpetrated equally by either gender.
What makes a teen a target for bullying?
The key behavioral ingredient
for being a victim is usually submissiveness. A bully usually chooses small,
shy, frail, or whiny teens who are loners. A bully needs to feel in control and
requires that the victim provide the bystanders a show of shame or humiliation.
Victims are made to feel like fools and often try to submit to the bully in an
attempt to stop the bullying. This behavior fuels the bully and increases the
entertainment for the bystanders.
What is the harm in being a bystander?
Many parents teach their children to "not get involved", to "stay out of it",
"to mind your own business." This parenting attitude causes teens to not jump
to the rescue and help the victim. Also, when a youth becomes an audience to
bullying, a cycle can begin. Watching someone be humiliated by a bully can
create a thrill in the bystander and eventually, this student may actually
identify with the bully and passively feel empowered by the negative actions of
the bully. The bystander may also identify with the victim and become afraid of
the bully or support the bully so they do not become a victim. The bully will
always be on the look out for new targets, and the bystander may be an easy
recruit, and the bystander wants to avoid this. Bystanders may also deny any
bullying is going on, or may be confused or afraid and not know what to do about
it.
So,
what makes a bullying incident?
Certain conditions must exist for a bullying incident to occur. Lots of kids
joke around with each other, call each other names, or engage in some fairly
physical horse-play and yet these incidents are not usually considered bullying
when they occur. The difference lies in the relationship of the bully and
victim, and in the intent of the interaction. Bullying usually, although not
always, occurs between individuals who are not friends. In a bullying situation,
there is a power difference between the bully and the victim. For instance, the
bully may be bigger, tougher, physically stronger or be able to intimidate
others or have the power to exclude others from their social group. The
intention of bullying is to put the victim in distress in some way and in this
way bullies seek power. Bullying knows no financial, cultural or social bounds
and bullying may not look exactly the same everywhere, but it has the same
devastating effect on everyone. In adolescence, bullying is not a problem that
usually sorts itself out and the effects of bullying can last a lifetime. It
causes misery and low self esteem for the victims, and leaves a lasting
impression on all those who witness repeated bullying incidents.
Bullies Come in Different Forms:
Physical Bullies
Physical bullies are action-oriented. This type of bullying includes hitting or
kicking the victim, or, taking or damaging the victim's property. This is the
least sophisticated type of bullying because it is so easy to identify. Physical
bullies are soon known to the entire population in the school. As they get
older, their attacks usually become more aggressive.
Verbal Bullies
Verbal bullies use words to hurt or humiliate another person. Verbal bullying
includes name-calling, insulting, making racist comments, creating and spreading
rumors and constant teasing. This type of bullying is the easiest to inflict on
other teens. It is quick and to the point. It can occur in the least amount of
time available, and its effects can be more devastating in some ways than
physical bullying because there are no visible scars.
Relational Bullies
Relational or relationship bullies try to convince their peers to exclude or
reject a certain person or people and cut the victims off from their social
connections. This type of bullying is linked to verbal bullying and usually
occurs when teens (most often girls) spread nasty rumors about others or exclude
an ex-friend from the peer group. The most devastating effect with this type of
bullying is the rejection by the peer group at a time when adolescents most need
their social connections.
Reactive victims
Reactive victims are a cross between being a bully and a victim. They are often
the most difficult to identify because at first glance they seem to be targets
for other bullies. Reactive victims often taunt bullies, and bully other people
themselves. In some cases, reactive victims begin as victims and become bullies
as they try to retaliate. A reactive victim will approach a person who has been
bullying him/her and say something like, "You better not bug me today, otherwise
I'll tell the teacher and boy, will you be in trouble, so you better watch out."
Statements such as this are like waving a red flag in front of a raging bull,
and may provoke a bully into action. Reactive victims then fight back and claim
self defense.
Types of Bullying Behavior:
Cyber bullying — a relatively new phenomenon — began surfacing as modern communication technologies advanced. Through email, instant messaging, Internet chat rooms, and electronic gadgets like camera cell phones, cyber bullies forward and spread hurtful images and/or messages. Bullies use this technology to harass victims at all hours and in wide circles of bystanders.
Emotional bullying - can be more subtle and can involve isolating or excluding a child from activities (i.e., shunning the victim in the lunchroom or on school outings) or spreading rumors. This kind of bullying is especially common among girls.
Physical bullying- can accompany verbal bullying and involves things like kicking, hitting, biting, pinching, hair pulling, or threats of physical harm.
Racist bullying- preys on teens through racial slurs, offensive gestures, or making jokes about a youth's cultural traditions.
Sexual bullying- involves unwanted physical contact or sexually abusive or inappropriate comments.
Verbal bullying- usually involves name-calling, incessant mocking, and laughing at a teen's expense.
What makes a Bully?
Bullying behavior can be identified as early as pre-school age, and some
children who are bullies continue this behavior through their teens and into
adulthood. Most children learn to control their anger and fighting instincts as
they grow older, but not the bully. These youth have particular behavior and
personality traits.
Resource:
The above information was obtained from:
Take Action Against Bullying. Bully Beware: Bully B'Ware Productions. <http://www.bullybeware.com/>.
Work Cited:
Olweus, Dan. Bullying at School: Understanding Children's Worlds.
Blackwell Publishing. Victoria: Australia, 1993.